Compass No.17
On the ghost ship that didn't carry us, choosing less suffering, iterations over time spent, and doing the right things for the right reasons
Thought provoking quote
“I'll never know, and neither will you, of the life you don't choose. We'll only know that whatever that sister life was, it was important and beautiful and not ours. It was the ghost ship that didn't carry us. There's nothing to do but salute it from the shore.” (Cheryl Strayed from Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice from Dear Sugar)
Podcast insights that stayed with me
Recently, AngelList co-founder and technology investor, Naval Ravikant, was interviewed on the Modern Wisdom podcast.
The advice he would give his younger self knowing what he knows now in terms of temperament and age related experience. What would he have done differently?
“I would have done everything the same except I would have done it with less anger, less emotion, and less eternal suffering because that was optional, it wasn’t necessary. I would argue that someone who can do the job at least peacefully, but maybe happily, is going to be more effective than someone who has unnecessary emotional turmoil.”
Naval also argues that we don’t spend enough time thinking through the big decisions in life.
He references the "secretary problem" which studies optimal stopping time. In the example case of the computer science professor interviewing secretaries, the optimal strategy was to reject the first 1/3, and then hire the next candidate who is as good as or better than all those they had rejected thus far.
The point he focuses on is that the 1/3 is not time based, it’s iteration based (the number of shots you took on goal). Iteration is not about pure repetition, it’s about modifying and launching different versions to account for error correction.
Question inspired by a recent essay
Last week, I published my interview with Micah Pueschel, the lead vocalist and guitar player for Iration. After his best-friend and co-vocalist, Kai Rediske, got married and left the band to be able to spend more time at home, Micah had to navigate becoming the sole vocalist and work with the band to redefine the band’s identity and sound. I asked him what navigating that period of uncertainty was like for him.
“I would love to say that I handled it, went up there, and did it all with pure confidence. There were a lot of times where I was scared, nervous, anxious, didn't know what was going on, didn't know what to do, and felt like it was all on my shoulders. That said, I have always been a person that trusted in the idea that as long as you do the right things and do them for the right reasons, the little things will fall into place and the world will open for you. I’m a firm believer in that, and it’s worked out in my life.”
For anyone undergoing a period of change or transition, What’s your version of doing the right things for the right reasons?